Married, still travel alone

The first solo trip I had was about five years ago. My boyfriend at that time was working overseas, and I had been sitting in my home for quite a while. The urge to travel was growing stronger with each passing day. Unfortunately, being a controlling and jealous person (warning: avoid guys who have these qualities at all cost), he was not in support of the idea of me travelling without him. The Easter holidays were approaching and I just could not stand the idea of spending another long weekend mourning and dreaming. So, I booked myself a flight trip to Venice.

The trip lasted for just four days, but it was enough time for me to taste the sweet freedom that comes with solo travelling. I can still remember the feeling of liberation I experienced when I sat in the water bus and just allowed Venice to expand in front of me with every canal I turned. Without the need to compromise, I went around the canal three times and by the time I was through, it was sunset. I did the same thing the next day. Ever since then, I fell in love with travelling alone.

Now, I am a happily married woman who still takes solo breaks. Last year, after I quit my corporate job, I travelled around South-East Asia on my own for three months. I am thankful for the great understanding and support my lovely husband has shown to me. Nowadays, although we do go on holidays together, I still take a solo trip for 1-2 weeks every three to four months.

A lot of people find it hard to understand; they think like, wouldn't it be nicer to travel with a loved one? The thing is yes, we are married, but that does not mean my husband and i are the same person. We are separate beings with different needs and interests. While he enjoys being on the road, I love staying and soaking myself in a place; while I prefer hiking in the mountains, he prefers to ride an ATV through the woods. I love our differences; the fact that we complement each other makes us a good team. But this also means making compromises in our daily lives and holidays. My solo trips serve as a getaway from our marriage; a means to recharge and refresh.

Personally, I believe travelling separately is a sign of a great relationship. As a solo female traveller I believe it's a sign of deep trust between each other and respect for each other's individuality. In China, people often say that marriage is like a cage. Luckily for me, my marriage has brought me more freedom, and it has allowed me to make more explorations, discovering the world and myself.

Additionally, everyone needs some space. Being apart occasionally is healthy for a relationship. Sometimes, we can forget how much we love and depend on each other. Missing each other is a sweet reminder of the connection we have built.

Married or single, whatever your relationship status might be, it is all about following your heart; it's about pursuing what makes you happy. Travelling solo is my choice. What is yours and what is your story?


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Joly Zou1 Comment